:Cyclostat

So, biking around town gives me some time to think. It’s never about fun stuff, or interesting stuff. It’s usually about how shitty it is to bike on these roads, and why I’ve volunteered to be an enthusiastic member of transportation’s lower class.

Here is how I see the road:

Thanks for the right hand side, guys. If anyone is interested, this is Willow Ave in Somerville, and I just ride in the middle of the road. People beep, and rev their engines to pass me, but I don’t care. I can’t handle riding on this crap. When they fix the right hand side of the road, then I’ll ride there.

When I ride in the middle of Willow Ave, I have imaginary disputes, where some guy in a car yells at me and we get into an argument. “Get to the right, asshole!” and I ask him if he lives in Somerville. If he doesn’t, then he has no right to lecture me about riding on the roads that my taxes pay for. If he does live in Somerville, then he needs to do more to keep the roads from falling into disrepair. The guy in the car is stunned by my impenetrable logic and he just sits there in the middle of the road, blocking traffic. Then I bike off, knowing that I have blown. his. mind.

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